January post, Valentine’s, and should women pursue men?

Sometimes I feel like I’m too honest and too vulnerable in my posts but then other times I’m like “Nah say what you gotta say sis!” And most of it is because quite a few guys read my posts and that makes me VERY self conscious. Mostly because I’m not writing these for them! I’m writing these posts for all the women who’ve gone through similar situations as I have and can relate. But y’all are going to do what y’all wanna do.

To the women that do read my posts, thank you. It is because of you all I keep going and keep plenty of these up even though I feel like I could stand to delete about two or three of these.

I also wanted to quickly talk about my January post since I recieved a few questions. The other day I was talking to my friend after church and we were talking about my previous post and I mentioned something about me hating men. Let me explain, I am still attracted to men and only men. What I meant was, men do a lot of things that annoy me and that’s why I don’t talk or get past the “getting to know you stage” I don’t even like texting them. A lot of times the men who’ve shown the bare minimum of interest in me don’t admit it. So with that being said, no I’m not dating men until one comes along that doesn’t waste my time.


I had originally planned on posting this right before Valentine’s Day just to give you all an idea of my thoughts on the Holiday but I didn’t want you guys calling me another bitter black woman with an opening like that. However, I unlike many single women of color LOVE the day. I also love dark chocolate and being able to buy day after 70% off chocolate is even better!


I also think people should enjoy this day with their significant other’s. I didn’t have one this year, or last year, or the year before that, but I did have a Galentine this year and it was just as great. Don’t be bitter about Valentine’s Day guys. Our time will soon come.


But for my next subject. I asked this question on my Instagram story and it was a hot mess.

Should women pursue men?


It was a mess because majority of men said yes.


Now see this is exactly why I don’t date.


All of this came about from a video I watched on YouTube from Joseph Solomon. Basically his answer was no. He was not in to women pursuing him and I wholeheartedly AGREE! I had about 30 people answer this poll and just a little more than half said no. Mostly women but some strong men of God as well. I agree because quite frankly, WHAT I LOOK LIKE GOING AFTER A MAN!? Y’all got me all the way messed up! Now if you’re a woman that has pursued a man then I’m in no way condeming you or about to tell you to stop. All I’m saying is that’s just not me. I would much rather have a man try to catch my attention than me try to catch his because if he doesn’t like me then I’m wasting my time. Now I’ve heard and know plenty of women who’ve gone after or initiated conversations with their now partners and it’s worked out for them. But like I said, Y’ALL NOT ABOUT TO CATCH ME OUT HERE LIKE THAT! That’s not what God has planned for me. What He has for ME in this season is to sit here and work, pay my bills, and be there for my friends. A man will come when he comes but for now I’m just trying to stabilize my anxiety.


I had wanted to include some kind of scripture or something about dating but instead I’ll just include the link to the video that you can all see for yourselves. As for the month of February, this is my one post. I’ve been super busy lately with two jobs, church ministries, and family. Life has just been a lot so please pray for me. I will leave you all with this,


And if our hope in Christ is only for this life, we are more to be pitied than anyone in the world.

1 Corinthians 15:19


I will see you all in March Lord willing. Don’t forget to like, comment, and share. I love you all!


Joseph Solomon Video


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