Do you

Sometimes I sit in my room and think to myself, “Wow, there’s people in this world that genuinely do not like me.” But then I realize that for every person that doesn’t like me, there’s like 10 people who adore me!

But this isn’t some vain post about all the people I’m cool with or how many friends I have.

This post is about how sometimes you’ll come across people who don’t or just stop liking you. And that’s okay. Who knows why these people stopped liking me; and I’m not talking about just ex best friends, there’s ex boyfriends that really despise me too but I’ve realized that I can not reverse who I am as a person. I am strong, I am opinionated, and I tell people the honest truth without sugar coating things. For example, if you’re dating a sh*tty guy, I am going to tell you that he’s a sh* tty guy and that you deserve better because I want what’s best for you. I’ve realized that some women just aren’t strong enough to simply walk away from bad relationships like I am and that’s okay.

(Actually it’s not okay. Know your worth child!)

As for ex boyfriends, I know that I am not perfect but I also want what’s best for me. No I haven’t always made the best relationship decisions, but I have always had the strength to walk away from each one when it became more than I could handle. It was when I realized that my sad/miserable days outweighed my happy/content days within my relationship. In the most humble way possible I tell myself that I deserve the best because I believe that I myself am the best and I am worthy of a healthy and God driven love. If I am not receiving what I want out of a relationship then it’s time for me to leave. But for some reason, some of my ex’s believe that this was “asking for too much” or me being “spoiled” so they dislike me because I decided to walk away from them without continuing to put up with their mess.

Well yes. I am spoiled. I was spoiled by a man that loves me unconditionally and worked hard to provide for me and show me what a real man is like.

Thank you daddy.

But anyways, I say all of that to say this; there will be people that come around and will genuinely not like you and there isn’t anything you can do about it but to accept it. People come into your life for reasons and it teaches you something about them. That people are not perfect. We all have flaws and insecurities and oftentimes these people will try to break YOUR spirit and take it out on YOU. But you need not to worry about these people. Block them, move on with your life, and enjoy the peace God gives you when you realize that you don’t even need these people in your life. Think about the people that do like you and think your amazing and a joy to be around. These are the people that matter.

betterkanye

Update* I forgot to mention go follow the new Instagram: @alliamisyoursblog

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Questions?

Now that August is finally over I decided to wait until September to write my next post and I am so glad that I did. These past two weekends have been crazy busy but very good nonetheless.

I went to a PJ Morton concert.

I went out to eat with my family.

I picked up some extra hours at work.

I met my dad’s new girlfriend?

I hung out with some friends and spent Labor Day with my family and friends. 

 

So all in all it has been a pretty good ending to August considering the way that month started out. I can feel that some really good things are beginning to happen in my life but I am going to save that news for another time!

 

I got a few really good questions so here they are, your questions to me answered:

 

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Thank you! And yes I do. As I’ve said in a previous post I have really oily skin. I always have dealt with acne and scarring but it wasn’t until I really started wearing more makeup that I realized, I really need to take better care of my skin.

So I do a few things. I use African black soap by Shea Moisture to scrub off all the dirt and leftover makeup at the end of the day. I also use witch hazel with a small cotton round to really get inside my pores. Sometimes I use a little Vitamin E oil for scarring (It’s pretty oily so I don’t cover my whole face in it). Lastly, I just recently bought some rose oil spray from Marshalls for $5.99 so I use that in the morning and at night after I’ve washed my face so that it’s a little moisturized but not overly moisturized.

 

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Personally, when it comes to relationships I am not one to take people back. But i’m not saying that you shouldn’t. I believe that it’s something you need to seek God for guidance on. If you believe that that person has truly changed and the two of you can move on without dwelling on the past then go for it. In friendships, it’s kind of the same thing for me. I don’t believe in holding grudges but after someone has done me wrong, I have to be weary of them. Guard your heart and try not put yourself in the position to be hurt by them again. If you really love them (whether it’s a family member, friend, or relationship), and feel that they have learned from their mistakes then yes, give them that second chance but do it because YOU want to. People do change and growth is real. Try not to let other’s influence YOUR decisions but also be mindful of their advice. At the end of the day the decision to stay or move on is all based on what you want to do.

 

But if God is sending you signs that you need to leave that person alone then LEAVE THAT PERSON ALONE.

 

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Thank you. Well I would just start off by asking them if you can talk to them about something serious. What I do, is I rehearse what I want to say beforehand. Form your words as if you were talking to someone you don’t even know so that you’re not letting your own emotions show through your words. Also, tell them why you feel the way that you do. Remind them that you’re only telling them because you care but ultimately be mindful about how they might react to the news. You may help them or you may lose a friend, but if telling them how you feel helps them to walk away from whatever situation they are facing then I would say that it’s worth it.

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Ahh yes, I do listen to various types of music. Gospel and worship music are some of my favorites when I’m having a bad day or just need a pick me up. I use Spotify and my playlists are all public so feel free to follow them or just look through them to see what I’m listening to. Currently, I’m really in to Tell All My Friends by Will Reagan and United Pursuit. I’ll post that and some of my other favorites below. But to just tell name a few I really love Israel Houghton, Elevation Church, Hillsong, Travis Greene, Tasha Cobbs, Jesus Culture, Crowder, Social Club, John Givez, Andy Mineo, Mali Music, and sooooo much more!

Tell All My Friends

Worships Songs Playlist

Rap songs by Christian Artists

Mali Music Playlist

Blessings Playlist by Spotify

 

So that’s all of my questions for this week! Feel free to continue sending me your questions here. I also wanted to thank you all for taking the time to click the link to my friends ministry page on the last post. If you missed it you can find it again here. Also, one of my friends from my church is planning to go on The world race so if you are being led to donate to a cause or just want to learn more about what that is you can click the link to her page here. Thanks again for taking the time to read my post. Don’t hesitate comment, like, and share!

 

 

 

Daddy’s girl.

I had originally planned to write and have this post ready on actual Father’s Day but like I do every Sunday, I came home from church, ate, and took a long and much needed nap. Then I woke up and got distracted by Twitter and TV.

 

 

But anyways…

 

 

My father. There are so many things I can say about him, many of which people already know. He’s this strong, hard working, faithful man of God that many people see and what I see as well. It’s amazing to me how many people come up to me in church and say, “oh Arturo is your dad? We love him so much!” Yes, my dad loves serving, and seeing him active in church has given me a love for it as well. Now I probably don’t have a wake up at 7am on a Saturday morning love of serving like he does but i’m getting there.

 

 

Since I started blogging I’ve been pretty forward about my upbringing. But to catch some of you guys up here it is; My parents got married a year and a half after I was born and they separated just days before my twelfth birthday. For as long as I can remember I have always been a daddy’s girl so it was no question that I would remain living with my dad. But it was hard. I mean at the time my mom had her own demons she was struggling with so staying with my dad was the best decision I could have made and it would have broke my daddy’s heart for him to see me leave. I literally am the only family my dad has in the state of Virginia. As I look back on those days I can’t help but be amazed at how far we’ve come. Not only was I going through puberty at the time of the separation and didn’t have my mom around but it just seemed like life was just getting harder and harder. There were so many times where my daddy couldn’t find work, couldn’t afford rent, couldn’t afford to pay bills. We spent summers without water and/or air conditioning, winters without heat, months without transportation but I never went hungry. I always had clean clothes and I always had my dad who loved me and prayed for me. Prayed for us. And God always came through and provided.

 

 

This year for Father’s Day I brought him some food from this new Peruvian place by the house and my dad loved it. After we ate he went in his room and took a nap and as I layed in my bed I just thanked God for us being able to enjoy this hot day inside with central air! Sometimes I look at my life and I think that I’m just stuck and I can’t seem to be moving in any direction but then I look at all the blessings around me and rejoice. They may be small things that most people don’t think about but when you’ve spent summers in a house with no air and it’s 95 degrees outside and you look forward to night time, you’ll realized just how blessed you are. Even when you can’t see God moving, He is.

 

 

I truly thank God for my dad’s role in my life. It’s taught me just how much it means to truly be a man and I use my father as a model for how I would want my future husband to treat me and be a father to our kids. Which really eliminates a lot of guys that I shouldn’t be dealing with in the first place and that’s wonderful. I want to be with a man that my father would be proud to see me with. A man that my dad knows will be faithful in his walk with The Lord, that will work hard to provide, and that I can be safe and secure around.

 

 

So thank you daddy, for raising me in the church, for taking me to the park on saturdays in exchange for pulling out your gray hairs, for always buying me something no matter what store we were in (even Lowe’s), for giving me money for my feminine hygiene products as a teenager and then making corny jokes about them, “You bought a box of cookies?”, for laughing with me when I have to correct you on your accent on certain American words, for everything. Even as a 24 year old woman who’s the same height as you, I am still and will always be your little girl.